Dipping into the topic of “aristocratic tutoring” (see: a couple of notes ago), I thought, strange that today’s aristocratic kids go to school. So I decided to look up the school that the British royals send their boys to, and how it was founded. Guys, I’m sorry to say that even “elite” Eton was founded to upskill the slave class (whom they controlled) while the elites themselves continued to hire private tutors. Something to be reminded of if you think sending your kid to a “good school” is the only thing that matters. #parentstr #mumstr #BitcoinMums #BitcoinMoms #education #school #unschooling #sovereigneducation

I have friends who are TTC (trying to conceive) or pregnant recently and knowing that I’m a huge nerd who basically designed a PhD-level reading list for myself to learn all things pregnancy and early childhood, asked me for recommendations on what to read. After about 40 books, I have four picks: 1) On pregnancy: Expecting Better by Emily Oster. I currently subscribe to Oster’s ParentData newsletters and while I will say I don’t always agree with her data-only approach (eg. sleep training), Expecting Better was helpful for a first-time pregnancy, especially because there are so many old wives’ tales, and it’s just nice to have some clarity and at least a starting point that helps you research further and ask the right questions. (Which is how I now approach ParentData). 2) More on pregnancy: Nurture by Erica Chidi. Most people know very little about the physiology of pregnancy and their options on the medical front. To be honest, I was a little afraid of giving birth and read about a dozen books on this subject alone. This was by far the most empowering in terms of teaching you the biology, how to advocate for yourself in medical settings and also simply in tone. It was like being able to interview a friend who is also a hugely experienced midwife. 3) Infant brain development, especially sleep: The Nurture Revolution by Greer Kirshenbaum. As alluded to in the first book rec, I don’t believe data is everything (I can’t stand epidemiology in general) — science is a huge piece of the puzzle, and this is a brilliant book by a neuroscientist who has studied infant brains for years. The gamechanging takeaway in this book for me is that sleep training is not ok, the neuroscience doesn’t support it, even if the data seemingly does. In short, sleep is a biological need and you can’t “train” it when they’re infants (even when it appears you did and you’re undisturbed for a full night, it’s not because the baby didn’t wake up, they would have, but you’ve trained them to not ask for you, which is terrible for their stress hormone and they will end up having trouble with it their whole lives). 4) Behaviour: Discipline without damage by Vanessa Lapointe. I read a ton of behaviour books and for me, none made more sense, and was more applicable than this one. Many other popular ones had lots of scripts, and while they gave me a general understanding, I didn’t feel like I knew how to embody all that as a parent. Something that really clicked for me in this book is the idea of a parent having “swagger” — to show confident, kind leadership without having to be permissive and watch your boundaries melt away, while also being empathetic, approachable and trustworthy. The theory is that kids need a leader to model and go to for safety etc. and that consistent boundaries provided lovingly are really the best thing you can give your children. It’s “gentle” parenting but by no means permissive. I’ll add that I have no specific recommendations on books about education. I read quite a few (you’ll see some quoted in previous notes), but I find each to be very focused on the author’s philosophy/method/curriculum of choice. They were all helpful in giving me an idea of what’s possible, but ultimately choosing one is like choosing an education pathway, whereas at the moment I’m more keen to observe my own child to see what works. So unfortunately that means I think you should read all of them 😂 But one easy conclusion from having read so many is that schools as we know them are a complete sham, they are designed to create worker bees, even elite schools (they just churn out higher paid worker bees, ahem, bankers). If you’ve read any of the books I’ve mentioned or have other recommendations or thoughts, do comment and share! Maybe this could be the beginning of a little #BitcoinMums Book Club…? #momstr #mumstr #kids #parentstr #parenting #bitcoinmoms #family #pregnancy #education #children #dadstr

Happy Monday Nostriches! #mumlife #parentstr #mumstr #momstr

Oh yes, good point. I didn’t use Expecting Better as a comprehensive guide, instead I liked that it helped debunk some common myths, as opposed to say What To Expect When You’re Expecting, which is just full of parroted misinformation. I haven’t read Portal, thanks for the rec! I did read Ina May Gaskin, definitely a classic — if I remember correctly, the content was similar to Nurture but I liked Nurture for the slightly more modern tone and how it inspired (personal) medical advocacy. Would love to know if you read other good parenting books too!

Came across an interesting article about “aristocratic tutoring” ie. one on one learning that was the norm for rich families. They hired tutors, usually experts in their subjects, and the kids learned incredibly deeply and quickly. (The author notes it was once the norm to teach kids to read at 2-3 years old; that was the hook for this article because he taught his kid to read referencing these methods). It’s very much the opposite of “schools” as we know it and quite similar to some forms of homeschooling. However, more “free” or “play-based” philosophies will tell you not to bother with reading until around 7, or “whenever they need it, they’ll learn it” kinda thing. Aristocratic tutoring also reminds me of concepts like Alpha School in the US, where they use AI screen-based learning to complete academics in 2 hours per day, and the rest of the time, the kids learn life skills or other skills they’re interested in like sports or carpentry. Article here: https://www.thefp.com/p/i-taught-my-three-year-old-to-read-tutoring-education-culture #mumstr #momstr #homeschool #unschool #bitcoinmums #bitcoinmoms #kidstr #education

I *think* it’s fixed now. Thanks again!

Oh thanks for letting me know! It’s been too long since I’ve logged on

Thank you, this is such a nice comment! I’ll try to keep sharing when I get a moment between, well, all the kid stuff 😆 I hope Bitcoin Mums is interesting to all parents, we’re all in it together 💪